Top 46 Quotes by Kinky Friedman

I'm too young for Medicare and too old for women to care.

I admit I was drinking a Guinness... but I did not swallow.

I don't remember the first half of my life. All I say is a happy childhood is the worst possible preparation for life.

I just want Texas to be number one in something other than executions, toll roads and property taxes.

We're first on executions. We're 49th in funding public education. We're in a race with Mississippi for the bottom, and we're winning.

Remember: Y'all is singular. All y'all is plural. All y'all's is plural possessive.

We've had to be creative to get on the ballot.

We were a country band with a social conscience.

If Willie Nelson had been Rosa Parks, there never would have been a civil rights movement in this country, because he refuses to leave the back of the bus.

I even went so far as to become a Southern Baptist for a while, until I realized that they didn't hold 'em under long enough.