You may be a redneck if... your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand. Jeff Foxworthy fireworkgoallifetime Change image and share on social
Have you ever seen people so ugly that you have to get someone else to verify it? Jeff Foxworthy peopleuglyverify Change image and share on social
My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling is if they turn out good, then that means I was a good daddy and put a lot of effort into it. If they turn out bad, it means they took after her side of the family. Jeff Foxworthy analyticbaddaddy share on social
I really don't require a whole lot in life. Jeff Foxworthy lifelotrequire Change image and share on social
Watching a baby being born is a little like watching a wet St. Bernard coming in through the cat door. Jeff Foxworthy babybearbernard Change image and share on social
If you ever start feeling like you have the goofiest, craziest, most dysfunctional family in the world, all you have to do is go to a state fair. Because five minutes at the fair, you'll be going, 'you know, we're alright. We are dang near royalty.' Jeff Foxworthy alrightcrazydang share on social
If your working television sits on top of your non-working television, you might be a redneck. Jeff Foxworthy rednecksittelevision Change image and share on social
You moon the wrong person at an office party and suddenly you're not 'professional' any more. Jeff Foxworthy moonofficeparty Change image and share on social
The more excited the rooster gets, the higher his voice goes. He's got a little bit of a Barney Fife quality to him. Jeff Foxworthy barneybiteexcite Change image and share on social
The stuff that made me mad 20 years ago doesn't really make me mad any more. Jeff Foxworthy agomadmake Change image and share on social
