I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, 'Where's the self-help section?' She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose. George Carlin askbookstoredefeat Change image and share on social
One can never know for sure what a deserted area looks like. George Carlin areadesert Change image and share on social
When you step on the brakes your life is in your foot's hands. George Carlin brakefoothand Change image and share on social
In comic strips, the person on the left always speaks first. George Carlin comicleaveperson Change image and share on social
I think it would be interesting if old people got anti-Alzheimer's disease where they slowly began to recover other people's lost memories. George Carlin alzheimerantibegin Change image and share on social
If you can't beat them, arrange to have them beaten. George Carlin arrangebeat Change image and share on social
Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things. George Carlin petpettysweat Change image and share on social
There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls. George Carlin howlmoonnight Change image and share on social
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away. George Carlin buildcalldoctor Change image and share on social