'I am' is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that 'I do' is the longest sentence? George Carlin englishlanguagelong Change image and share on social
By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth. George Carlin conceallanguagelarge Change image and share on social
Weather forecast for tonight: dark. George Carlin darkforecasttonight Change image and share on social
One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. George Carlin floortequila Change image and share on social
Electricity is really just organized lightning. George Carlin electricitylightningorganize Change image and share on social
Dusting is a good example of the futility of trying to put things right. As soon as you dust, the fact of your next dusting has already been established. George Carlin dustestablishfact Change image and share on social
I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, 'Where's the self-help section?' She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose. George Carlin askbookstoredefeat Change image and share on social
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it. George Carlin authoritypeoplepope Change image and share on social
Standing ovations have become far too commonplace. What we need are ovations where the audience members all punch and kick one another. George Carlin audiencecommonplacekick Change image and share on social
