One thing I would say is real cops have real gallows senses of humor and make incredibly funny and inappropriate jokes in the presence of dead people all the time. Daniel J. Goor copdeadfunny Change image and share on social
An optimist is a fellow who believes a housefly is looking for a way to get out. George Jean Nathan believefellowhousefly Change image and share on social
Until you walk a mile in another man's moccasins you can't imagine the smell. Robert Byrne imaginemanmile Change image and share on social
It's funny how things change slowly, until the day we realize they've changed completely. Nancy Gibbs changecompletelyday Change image and share on social
When I was younger, my sister thought it was funny to pretend to punch me in the face because my mom was concerned about my teeth falling out. They were loose for a long time, and she knocked out my teeth. Amy Adams concernfacefall share on social
Everything I like is either illegal, immoral or fattening. Alexander Woollcott fattenillegalimmoral Change image and share on social
It's so funny because if you tweet your lyrics and then you hear it in a song next week, you're like, 'Hey I had that same idea.' I'm very secretive with my music. We have to send emails password protected. Because once that song gets out, you aren't selling that thing. Ester Dean emailfunnyhear share on social
Comedians don't laugh. They're too busy analyzing why it's funny or not. James Lipton analyzebusycomedian Change image and share on social
I'm particularly bad at breaking if something's funny. I'm not professional, so I do often laugh, but less at what I do and more often at what other people do. Timothy Simons badbreakfunny Change image and share on social
Do you know who I would love to play? Morticia Addams - then I could use all that darkness to be funny. Monica Bellucci addamdarknessfunny Change image and share on social
