It was a JOB; the video show was a JOB; you don't tell the Aristocrats joke at 8 o'clock at night on network tv, it would be funny though. But those guys know I like dirty stuff, I like clean stuff too. Bob Saget funny stuff aristocrat share on social
I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by. Douglas Adams deadline love make Change image and share on social
I'm spending a year dead for tax reasons. Douglas Adams dead reason year Change image and share on social
Best way to get rid of kitchen odors: Eat out. Phyllis Diller kitchen odor eat Change image and share on social
Turn up the lights. I don't want to go home in the dark. O. Henry home light turn Change image and share on social
To label me an intellectual is a misunderstanding of what that is. Dick Cavett intellectual label misunderstand Change image and share on social
My boy and I move. We have this game where if we dress in a particular item of clothing, we have to do a different movement. A hat means 20 jumps - that sort of thing. When I put a scarf on, my son has to drop down and do push-ups, immediately. He thinks it's really funny. Magnus Scheving boy dress move share on social
When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity. Albert Einstein red hot sit Change image and share on social
I grew up in Europe, where the history comes from. Eddie Izzard europe history grow Change image and share on social
Parrots make great pets. They have more personality than goldfish. Chevy Chase make pet personality Change image and share on social
