My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint. Erma Bombeck bedbunkchore Change image and share on social
I will buy any creme, cosmetic, or elixir from a woman with a European accent. Erma Bombeck accentbuycosmetic Change image and share on social
Humorists can never start to take themselves seriously. It's literary suicide. Erma Bombeck humoristliterarystart Change image and share on social
All of us have moments in our lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them. Erma Bombeck carpetchildcourage Change image and share on social
Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth. Erma Bombeck birthcarlend Change image and share on social
People shop for a bathing suit with more care than they do a husband or wife. The rules are the same. Look for something you'll feel comfortable wearing. Allow for room to grow. Erma Bombeck bthecarecomfortable Change image and share on social
Being a child at home alone in the summer is a high-risk occupation. If you call your mother at work thirteen times an hour, she can hurt you. Erma Bombeck callchildhigh Change image and share on social
If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead. Erma Bombeck deaddeclarefootball Change image and share on social
Car designers are just going to have to come up with an automobile that outlasts the payments. Erma Bombeck automobilecardesigner Change image and share on social
