Top 88 Quotes by Demetri Martin

But I found that disappointing people is a good thing, because disapproval is freedom.

I wasn't even a big comedy nerd. A lot of the comedians I know - a lot of my friends are comedians - they knew a lot about comedy growing up.

If I have to move up in a building, I choose the elevator over the escalator. Because one time I was riding the escalator and I tripped. I fell down the stairs for an hour and a half.

I was walking in the park and this guy waved at me. Then he said, 'I'm sorry, I thought you were someone else.' I said, 'I am.'

When I was a kid, I always wanted to live in California because I liked skateboarding.

I know about Woodstock probably as much as your average person who is over 30, where I'd know Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, Grateful Dead.

I love Steven Wright. I was in high school in the '80s, and there was a lot of stand up on television.

There's a store in my neighborhood called Futon World. I like that name, 'Futon World.' Makes me think of a magical place that gets less and less comfortable over time.

To me, comedy is a game.

I was student council president in high school, and even in law school, I was vice-president of the student bar association.