Top 132 Quotes by Joan Rivers

About Joan Rivers

These are some quotes by American author Joan Rivers Comedian, who lived between June 8, 1933 and September 4, 2014.

My mother loved entertaining, and I've followed suit, so we have big celebrations for New Year, Passover, Thanksgiving and birthdays.

My mother loved entertaining, and I've followed suit, so we have big celebrations for New Year, Passover, Thanksgiving and birthdays.

Joan Rivers

I love Vines. You make this 6.4-second drama, and you can reach 6 million viewer, and make people laugh. I find it so fabulous.

I love Vines. You make this 6.4-second drama, and you can reach 6 million viewer, and make people laugh. I find it so fabulous.

Joan Rivers

Every comedian is furious. Age makes me angry. I'm unhappy at not being able to open packages anymore. I'm angry that libraries have gone. I hate children on planes. I'm very shallow, so they tend to be little things. To be honest, I think I was probably angry the day I was born, you know, about diapers or something.

Joan Rivers

The thing is, I'm happiest when I'm on stage.

The thing is, I'm happiest when I'm on stage.

Joan Rivers

Everyone forgets comedians are actors. There's no question about it. A Robin Williams cannot say the same line every night for 40 weeks and make it sound fresh unless he's doing an acting job.

Everyone forgets comedians are actors. There's no question about it. A Robin Williams cannot say the same line every night for 40 weeks and make it sound fresh unless he's doing an acting job.

Joan Rivers

It's feast or famine in showbiz.

It's feast or famine in showbiz.

Joan Rivers

Anyone that says looks don't count is lying. Of course they do. Even babies go to the attractive face. It's the way humans work.

Anyone that says looks don't count is lying. Of course they do. Even babies go to the attractive face. It's the way humans work.

Joan Rivers

I hate reality shows that are not reality.

I hate reality shows that are not reality.

Joan Rivers

I made so many jokes about poor Russell Crowe, he once knocked on my dressing room door, and told me he wanted to go out on this chat show we were on to laugh with me. Now he's ruined it. I can't make another joke about him.

Joan Rivers

I think any celebrity that adopts a child from a third world country is a fool.

I think any celebrity that adopts a child from a third world country is a fool.

Joan Rivers

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