Television is a device that permits people who haven't anything to do to watch people who can't do anything. Fred Allen devicepeoplepermit Change image and share on social
You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood, place it in the navel of a fruit fly and still have room enough for three caraway seeds and a producer's heart. Fred Allen carawayflyfruit Change image and share on social
We are living in the machine age. For the first time in history the comedian has been compelled to supply himself with jokes and comedy material to compete with the machine. Whether he knows it or not, the comedian is on a treadmill to oblivion. Fred Allen agecomediancomedy share on social
A telescope will magnify a star a thousand times, but a good press agent can do even better. Fred Allen agentgoodmagnify Change image and share on social
An income tax form is like a laundry list - either way you lose your shirt. Fred Allen formincomelaundry Change image and share on social
An advertising agency is 85 percent confusion and 15 percent commission. Fred Allen advertiseagencycommission Change image and share on social
If I could get my membership fee back, I'd resign from the human race. Fred Allen backfeehuman Change image and share on social
What's on your mind, if you will allow the overstatement. Fred Allen mindoverstatement Change image and share on social
The first thing that strikes a visitor to Paris is a taxi. Fred Allen parisstriketaxi Change image and share on social
Treat employees like partners, and they act like partners. Fred Allen actemployeepartner Change image and share on social
