I'd rather have a full bottle in front of me than a full frontal lobotomy. Fred Allen bottlefrontfrontal Change image and share on social
The last time I saw him he was walking down lover's lane holding his own hand. Fred Allen handholdlane Change image and share on social
I don't have to look up my family tree, because I know that I'm the sap. Fred Allen familysaptree Change image and share on social
A celebrity is a person who works hard all of their life to become well known, and then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized. Fred Allen avoidcelebritydark Change image and share on social
A telescope will magnify a star a thousand times, but a good press agent can do even better. Fred Allen agentgoodmagnify Change image and share on social
An associate producer is the only guy in Hollywood who will associate with a producer. Fred Allen associateguyhollywood Change image and share on social
The vice-president of an advertising agency is a bit of executive fungus that forms on a desk that has been exposed to conference. Fred Allen advertiseagencybite Change image and share on social
I learned law so well, the day I graduated I sued the college, won the case, and got my tuition back. Fred Allen backcasecollege Change image and share on social
A committee is a group of the unprepared, appointed by the unwilling to do the unnecessary. Fred Allen appointcommitteegroup Change image and share on social
I have just returned from Boston. It is the only thing to do if you find yourself up there. Fred Allen bostonfindreturn Change image and share on social
