I'm standing behind a wall of jokes. You don't know about my personal life, my girlfriends, or what I do when I'm not on the road. There's this guy, this comedian, and this is how he thinks, but people really don't know anything about me. Steven Wright comediangirlfriendguy share on social
Like other kids wanted to become firemen or astronauts, I wanted to make people laugh. Steven Wright astronautfiremankid Change image and share on social
At one point he decided enough was enough. Steven Wright decidepoint Change image and share on social
Only one in four jokes ever works, and I still can't predict what people will laugh at. Steven Wright jokelaughpeople Change image and share on social
You can't have everything. Where would you put it? Steven Wright put Change image and share on social
My favorite book is anything by Kurt Vonnegut - he's my literary hero. I got to meet him several times, which was a great thrill for me. I don't really remember what we talked about. Steven Wright bookfavoritegreat Change image and share on social
I love eating chocolate cake and ice cream after a show. I almost justify it in my mind as, 'You were a good boy onstage and you did your show, so now you can have some cake and ice cream.' Steven Wright boycakechocolate Change image and share on social
I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time. Steven Wright backcoffeeinstant Change image and share on social
Someone asked me, if I were stranded on a desert island what book would I bring... 'How to Build a Boat.' Steven Wright askboatbook Change image and share on social
