Sam Kinison

My view of life is, 'If you're going to miss Heaven, why miss it by two inches? Miss it!

Rage only works if it is justified. That's the trick with rage. You gotta have a reason to be mad.

What am I responsible for? Who am I responsible to? Everybody? How come when Archie Bunker nailed everybody, it was funny - but when I do it, it's not?

I often laugh and say I should go down to the Department of the Interior and register as an endangered species. I'm a gay man over 60 and I'm alive.

MTV lets us do whatever we want. For me, there is freedom in serving an experienced client who knows what they want and has the money to do it. MTV is that for us.

When I was 6, I saw a commercial that Jessica Simpson was in, and that was the first time I felt my little heart flutter.