Top 30 Quotes by Jimmy Carr

It is such a social thing, laughing. Two thousand people in a room laughing is such a great buzz and they tend to laugh much more in a group.

Even if you're doing the national insurance awards, there's still that excitement when you wonder who is going to win, er, best premiums.

I don't see myself as offending people.

They say the people most affected by the credit crunch are pensioners - well, let go of the handbag then, Nanna.

I think the idea that death is not the end, that your dog's just gone to live on the farm, is limiting. Thoughts like that prevent you from making the most of the time that you have.

Staying in luxury hotels still gives me a kick, especially Oulton Hall in Yorkshire. I'd stay in a hotel for the breakfast and room service.

I was in the South of France. I saw a Brownie on a school trip. She was holding up a book. It said on the front 'rough guide'. I thought: 'Yeah' she's not a looker.

There's things that I couldn't joke about but other people could.

I didn't plan to be the rude middle-class comedian. You write a certain type of joke that you find funny, and mine happen to be often rude. Yes, it's juvenile, but that's me.

I was in love with the idea of being in love with a woman way before I was actually in love with one.