Tim Vine

With silly stuff, it's seventy-five percent confidence. I always tell people that it's because I'm nervous about getting that next laugh and I need to hear it. I always want to condense a joke.

I'm not someone who gets to play The O2 and places like that, but that's the kind of rock and roll venue. The popularity of stand-up means that some people are getting to play rock star venues.

As you get older you're told to be sensible, but it's important for writing if you're a comic that you're able to still access that childlike thing.

In the subprime mortgage industry, bankers handed out iffy loans like candy at a parade because such loans meant revenue and, hence, bonuses for executives in the here-and-now.

If every time you engage in a sex act, you go into a confession box, you will never accept your own sexuality.

I have a naturally camp sensibility and a camp sense of humour. I love the icons that gay people love.