I was a vegetarian until I started leaning toward the sunlight. Rita Rudner leanstartsunlight Change image and share on social
While I do occasionally order items on the Internet, it's hard to teach an old shopper new tricks. I'm convinced that the catalogue will eventually disappear, but not until the last baby boomers have kicked off their smelly Nikes and been buried in mulch. Rita Rudner babyboomerbury share on social
I started taking ballet lessons when I was 4, and I was performing in ballet companies when I was 10, and I did summer stock in Miami Beach when I was 12, and finally I said, 'I gotta go to Broadway.' Rita Rudner balletbeachbroadway Change image and share on social
Every audience has a personality. Some of them don't have the best personalities, but you're on a date with them for an hour and a half, so you just make the best of it. Rita Rudner audiencedatehalf Change image and share on social
They usually have two tellers in my local bank, except when it's very busy, when they have one. Rita Rudner bankbusylocal Change image and share on social
I'm a very simple person. I'm very shallow. Shallow, simple, easily pleased: that's me. Rita Rudner easilypersonplease Change image and share on social
It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. Rita Rudner annoyfindgreat Change image and share on social
I just love dogs, and there really is no better companion than an animal. Rita Rudner animalcompaniondog Change image and share on social
I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. Rita Rudner annoyfindgreat Change image and share on social
I had the worst birthday party ever when I was a child because my parents hired a pony to give rides. And these ponies are never in good health. But this one dropped dead. It just wasn't much fun after that. One kid would sit on him and the rest of us would drag him around. Rita Rudner badbirthdaychild share on social
