When every high school graduate can spell the word, 'inauguration,' let's put lampshades on our heads and listen to his speeches until Obama's voice gives out. Paula Poundstone graduateheadhigh Change image and share on social
The problem with cats is that they get the exact same look on their face whether they see a moth or an axe-murderer. Paula Poundstone axecatexact Change image and share on social
I was diagnosed a number of years ago with obsessive-compulsive disorder - which everyone has, to some degree - and I have this really annoying trait where in conversation, I always steer it back to something that happened to me. Paula Poundstone agoannoyback share on social
There are really only so many foods and so many ways you can prepare them. Paula Poundstone foodprepareway Change image and share on social
I have jokes I've told before and will tell again, but my favorite part of the night is talking to the crowd. Paula Poundstone crowdfavoritehave Change image and share on social
I did auditions at a club called the Comedy Connection. They wanted nothing to do with me. But one night they were doing a night of all women comics, and they invited me to do that. Paula Poundstone auditioncallclub Change image and share on social
I only do two things in my life, and that's take care of my kids and work. Fortunately, these are my favorite things to do, so it works out. Paula Poundstone carefavoritefortunately Change image and share on social
I don't have a bank account because I don't know my mother's maiden name. Paula Poundstone accountbankmaiden Change image and share on social
How do you come back? It's one step at a time. I'm optimistic because I don't know what else to be. Paula Poundstone backoptimisticstep Change image and share on social
I mean, I do love clever and witty, but I think that the 'Three Stooges' were geniuses. They'd have to be for their appeal to have lasted this long. Paula Poundstone appealclevergeniuse Change image and share on social