I just filled out my income tax forms. Who says you can't get killed by a blank? Milton Berle blankfillform Change image and share on social
I received a lot of complaints from parents who wrote and told me that their kids wouldn't go to sleep until our show was over. So I went on the air and told all the children watching to 'listen to their Uncle Miltie and go to bed right after the show.' Milton Berle airbedchild share on social
I feel like Zsa Zsa Gabor's sixth husband. I know what I'm supposed to do, but I don't know how to make it interesting. Milton Berle feelgaborhusband Change image and share on social
If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door. Milton Berle builddoorknock Change image and share on social
Like every comedian, if I heard a joke that I thought would work, I used it. Milton Berle comedianhearjoke Change image and share on social
Laughter is an instant vacation. Milton Berle instantlaughtervacation Change image and share on social
It's amazing how fast later comes when you buy now. Milton Berle amazebuyfast Change image and share on social
People say I owe a lot to television. The fact is I was a star long before television. What TV made me is unemployed. Milton Berle factlonglot Change image and share on social
If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands? Milton Berle evolutionhandmother Change image and share on social
