Michael Ian Black

If you get an idea, you might as well stick with it until somebody calls you on it.

I have a good family and I like to be home with them. The older I get, the lazier I get, and the more content I am to sit at home and eat string cheese.

Most of the time, you don't win anything on reality shows. You're booted off, or maybe you win $50,000, or $100,000, which isn't really life-changing. I don't know that it's worth it.

What I find is most people have a civics book understanding for how Congress works and how a bill moves.

When actresses jump on the anti-Iraq bandwagon, they often combine down-home momism with an ignorance of Islamist intent which is truly awesome.

Hollywood is a place where they'll pay you a thousand dollars for a kiss and fifty cents for your soul.