I've never won many awards, I didn't get certificates for swimming or anything. Karl Pilkington awardcertificatehave Change image and share on social
Getting old is better than being young. You can do what you want to do. Karl Pilkington young Change image and share on social
People who live in a glass house have to answer the door. Karl Pilkington answerdoorglass Change image and share on social
If you'd have told me five years ago that I'd have done all this - two books, some television and everything - I'd panic, I'd be scared. Karl Pilkington agobookpanic Change image and share on social
It's not a joke: I really do like being at home. Karl Pilkington homejoke Change image and share on social
People eat duck and you think, well, we've got loads of chickens, leave the ducks alone! Karl Pilkington chickenduckeat Change image and share on social
To be honest, marriage doesn't scare me and that, it's just once you've been together for so long, if you haven't got any kids it's just a big expensive day out for everyone else to enjoy, isn't it? Karl Pilkington bigdayenjoy Change image and share on social
The other day I was thinking - because I get a lot of headaches - I was wondering whether the head should be where it is. Because, at the end of the day, it's probably the heaviest part of your body, right? And yet it's at the top as opposed to, I don't, dangling at the bottom somewhere. Karl Pilkington bodybottomdangle share on social