Johnny Olson

Ladies be seated, a laugh doesn't cost you a dime.

Lights became so hot they melted mascara on women's faces in early television.

I have come up the hard way.

It is hardly surprising that women concentrate on the way they look instead of what is in their minds since not much has been put in their minds to begin with.

I know they call me a crazy lady, but I'm only interested in making movies and having people see them.

The American people need no course in philosophy or political science of church history to know that God should not be made into a celestial party chairman.