Top 54 Quotes by John Cleese

I have several times made a poor choice by avoiding a necessary confrontation.

When you've been doing comedy for forty years, you really do know most of the jokes. And even if you don't know a specific joke, you can pretty much guess what it's going to be.

I tend to have an odd split in my mind: I tend to look at it as a writer and when the writing thing is OK and I'm happy with it, then I put on my actor's hat.

Some actors, I think, want to feel that they are as creative as the writer. And the answer is, frankly, they're not.

In Britain, girls seem to be either bright or attractive. In America, that's not the case. They're both.

I think that money spoils most things, once it becomes the primary motivating force.

Sci-fi has never really been my bag. But I do believe in a lot of weird things these days, such as synchronicity. Quantum physics suggests it's possible, so why not?

I find it rather easy to portray a businessman. Being bland, rather cruel and incompetent comes naturally to me.

I would say that I began with a very edgy, very driven personality and after a sufficient amount of therapy over many, many years, I managed to become rather relaxed and happy.

Comedy always works best when it is mean-spirited.