For the first time ever, overweight people outnumber average people in America. Doesn't that make overweight the average then? Last month you were fat, now you're average - hey, let's get a pizza! Jay Leno americaaveragefat Change image and share on social
You can't stay mad at somebody who makes you laugh. Jay Leno laughmadmake Change image and share on social
Al Jazeera aired a new tape of Osama bin Laden. It was the usual stuff, he called Bush evil, the Great Satan, called him a war monger. Basically, the same thing you heard at last night's Democratic debate. Jay Leno airbasicallybin share on social
Don't forget Mother's Day. Or as they call it in Beverly Hills, Dad's Third Wife Day. Jay Leno beverlycalldad Change image and share on social
The University of Nebraska says that elderly people that drink beer or wine at least four times a week have the highest bone density. They need it - they're the ones falling down the most. Jay Leno beerbonedensity Change image and share on social
You cannot be mad at somebody who makes you laugh... it's as simple as that. Jay Leno laughmadmake Change image and share on social
Politics is just show business for ugly people. Jay Leno businesspeoplepolitic Change image and share on social
If I have one advantage, it's that I will try to work harder than the next guy. Jay Leno advantageguyhard Change image and share on social
Today is Valentine's Day - or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day! Jay Leno calldayextortion Change image and share on social
Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'? Jay Leno headlinelotterypsychic Change image and share on social