David Walliams

Reality always outstrips fiction. Whatever you make up, something more incredible always pops up in real life.

I was depressed as a child. I found it hard to make friends. My favourite thing was locking myself in the bathroom and practising comedy routines.

I don't know what I'll be like when I'm 60. I already have the traits of a retired gentleman.

My feeling for reality TV isn't ironic, guilty, or apologetic. Reality TV is one of the few remaining modes of popular entertainment in which characterization is permitted as plot.

It took me realizing that a broken heart has never actually killed anyone to find the courage to ask for what I want, in just about every situation. That was part of my own growing up.

I would've done anything to work with Satyajit Ray.