It is hard being a football loather, a football unfan. I sometimes feel as lonely as the sole survivor in the last reel of a Zombie film, as, one by one, old friends reveal themselves, with their glassy stares and outstretched arms, to have succumbed to the lure. Craig Brown armfeelfilm share on social
In real life, nothing would be more tedious than trailing around after two strangers as they went house-hunting in Hertfordshire. But for some reason, television is more compelling than real life. Craig Brown compelhertfordshirehouse Change image and share on social
What would we do without plaques to tell us who lived where and when? They introduce the past into the present, and are the quickest and most interesting way of reminding us that our streets exist above and beyond the here-and-now. Craig Brown existinterestintroduce share on social
It is only if you happen to be a newscaster that the tongue-twister spells peril. Craig Brown happennewscasterperil Change image and share on social
It strikes me that golf's great virtue is that it gets you out of the house, away from everyday bothers, away from the endless round of looking for this, that and the other. Craig Brown botherendlesseveryday Change image and share on social
The first sign builders are on their way is when - hey, presto! - a skip appears outside your house. Craig Brown appearbuilderhey Change image and share on social
Just as there is something about an empty skip that makes you want to fill it, so there is something about a full skip that makes you want to empty it. Craig Brown emptyfillfull Change image and share on social
In its heyday, the blazer had come to symbolise a kind of conventional decency. Yacht club commodores and school bursars wore blazers. People who played bowls wore blazers. Craig Brown blazerbowlbursar Change image and share on social
Looking back, some of the happiest moments of my childhood were spent with my arm in packets of breakfast cereal, rootling around for a free gift. Craig Brown armbackbreakfast Change image and share on social
Comedy is the slave of time. What seemed funny then is unlikely to seem funny now, just as what strikes us as funny now would not have seemed funny then. Craig Brown comedyfunnyslave Change image and share on social
