I don't get high, but sometimes I wish I did. That way, when I messed up in life I would have an excuse. But right now there's no rehab for stupidity. Chris Rock excusehighlife Change image and share on social
I used to hang out with grandfather all the time because he used to pick me up from school sometimes, or drive me to my mother's, so I'd be with my grandfather a lot. I used to watch him write his sermons. Chris Rock drivegrandfatherhang share on social
President of the United States is you know, our boss, so you know, the President and the First Lady are kinda like the Mom and the Dad of the country. And when your Dad says something you listen. Chris Rock boscountrydad Change image and share on social
Show me one guy or woman as funny as Rodney Dangerfield or as good as George Carlin, Richard Pryor, Bill Cosby, or Joan Rivers. There are a lot of good comics out there, no doubt, but as far as the quality of the comics goes, I think what you have is a bunch of situational comics. Chris Rock billbunchcarlin share on social
There's some downsides to being famous, which are not even worth mentioning. But to combat the bad sides of being famous, you really should take advantage of the good sides. The good sides are, you can use that fame to get projects you might not normally get. Chris Rock advantagebadcombat share on social
No film critic's going to say it, but 'Madagascar 3' is better than 'The Artist.' Chris Rock artistcriticfilm Change image and share on social
Gun control? We need bullet control! I think every bullet should cost 5,000 dollars. Because if a bullet cost five thousand dollar, we wouldn't have any innocent bystanders. Chris Rock 000bulletbystander Change image and share on social
It's like, hmm, there's people with $2000 weaves that could have bought health care with that weave money. They don't have insurance. People want what they want. And I guess that is a reason we have this big credit card problem and a lot of these foreclosures. Chris Rock bigbuycard share on social
When I hear people talk about juggling, or the sacrifices they make for their children, I look at them like they're crazy, because 'sacrifice' infers that there was something better to do than being with your children. Chris Rock childcrazyhear share on social
I'll go back to comedy clubs when they get a real no-camera policy, the same way they did with smoking. Chris Rock backcameraclub Change image and share on social
