Death is a distant rumor to the young. Andy Rooney deathdistantrumor Change image and share on social
I don't think the government is out to get me or help someone else get me but it wouldn't surprise me if they were out to sell me something or help someone else sell me something. I mean, why else would the Census Bureau want to know my telephone number? Andy Rooney bureaucensusgovernment share on social
The world must be filled with unsuccessful musical careers like mine, and it's probably a good thing. We don't need a lot of bad musicians filling the air with unnecessary sounds. Some of the professionals are bad enough. Andy Rooney airbadcareer share on social
The average bright young man who is drafted hates the whole business because an army always tries to eliminate the individual differences in men. Andy Rooney armyaveragebright Change image and share on social
The dullest Olympic sport is curling, whatever 'curling' means. Andy Rooney curldullmean Change image and share on social
I don't like food that's too carefully arranged; it makes me think that the chef is spending too much time arranging and not enough time cooking. If I wanted a picture I'd buy a painting. Andy Rooney arrangebuycarefully Change image and share on social
Computers may save time but they sure waste a lot of paper. About 98 percent of everything printed out by a computer is garbage that no one ever reads. Andy Rooney computergarbagelot Change image and share on social
