I have irrational fears, and they all go back to losing my father as a kid. I've never gotten over it. Tim Allen backfatherfear Change image and share on social
Men are liars. We'll lie about lying if we have to. I'm an algebra liar. I figure two good lies make a positive. Tim Allen algebrafiguregood Change image and share on social
The world's a mean place. It's unfair, then it's fair. It's hateful, then it's loving. It's a very peculiar place on philosophical and metaphysical and religious levels. Tim Allen fairhatefullevel Change image and share on social
For years, I just did not like this idea of God, church. Tim Allen churchgodidea Change image and share on social
I have an only child. She's so independent and good with adults. Tim Allen adultchildgood Change image and share on social
I was gone so much in my first marriage. I love the moments when I engage with my youngest daughter now. It's not my thing to sit on the ground and play tea party, but I'll do it because it's a moment that will stick with me forever. Tim Allen daughterengageforever share on social
Never comment on a woman's rear end. Never use the words 'large' or 'size' with 'rear end.' Never. Avoid the area altogether. Trust me. Tim Allen altogetherareaavoid Change image and share on social
Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pickup truck, and end up with a station wagon. Tim Allen carendferrari Change image and share on social
Electricity can be dangerous. My nephew tried to stick a penny into a plug. Whoever said a penny doesn't go far didn't see him shoot across that floor. I told him he was grounded. Tim Allen dangerouselectricityfloor Change image and share on social