Steve Harvey

How can smart women be so stupid about men sometimes? Lack of knowledge. It's what men have kept secret for so long.

You have nothing if you're texting a guy in a relationship. We can text six women a minute. We can text it and push 'reply all.' I mean, since we're lying, we might as well lie to everybody.

God has given me a life far beyond anything I ever dreamed about. God is, man, God is something else man.

People mature at different stages and I feel I'm learning a lot.

Jokes are very curious things psychologically.

If you're not having a good time, find something else that gives you some joy in life.