Rich Cohen

The Toothbrush mustache is the most powerful configuration of facial hair the world has ever known. It overpowers whoever touches it. By merely doodling a Toothbrush mustache on a poster, you make a political statement.

Most mustaches lie waiting for some Clark Gable or Tom Selleck to fix them in the mind. The greatest are identified with a single man, a bad man, usually, who so wrapped his identity with a particular configuration of facial hair that the two became inseparable.

What cracks me up is people who think I don't take baseball seriously. It's the most important thing in my life. They don't know how hard it is for me to get a bad game out of my mind. I still can't, but I'm getting better.

As I've told Tyler, there's not a really easy place between being single and being married for us now. We're just so busy that the logistics of our career make dating impossible. I think I'll find a girl at some point that makes all of the extra work and effort that needs to be put into it worth it. But for right now, I just date my drums.