I live in New Hampshire. We're in favor of global warming. Eleven hundred more feet of sea-level rises? I've got beachfront property. You tell us up there, 'By the end of the century, New York City could be underwater,' and we say, 'Your point is?' P. J. O'Rourke beachfrontcenturycity share on social
If I were a congressman who had voted for the American Jobs Creation Act of 2004, I'd claim it was forced on our country by a sinister international organization. P. J. O'Rourke actamericanclaim Change image and share on social
They are just really stupid people in Hollywood. You write them a script, and they say they love it, they absolutely love it. Then they say, 'But doesn't it need a small dog, and an Eskimo, and shouldn't it be set in New Guinea?' And you say, 'But it is a sophisticated romantic comedy set in Paris.' P. J. O'Rourke absolutelycomedydog share on social
Government proposes, bureaucracy disposes. And the bureaucracy must dispose of government proposals by dumping them on us. P. J. O'Rourke bureaucracydisposedump Change image and share on social
We journalists don't have to step on roaches. All we have to do is turn on the kitchen light and watch the critters scutter. P. J. O'Rourke critterjournalistkitchen Change image and share on social
Wealth is not a pizza, where if I have too many slices you have to eat the Domino's box. P. J. O'Rourke boxdominoeat Change image and share on social
Humans are the only animals that have children on purpose with the exception of guppies, who like to eat theirs. P. J. O'Rourke animalchildeat Change image and share on social
The idea of capitalism is not just success but also the failure that allows success to happen. P. J. O'Rourke capitalismfailurehappen Change image and share on social
All business is capitalistic. You require capital for any sort of business endeavour. P. J. O'Rourke businesscapitalcapitalistic Change image and share on social
Even the dumber parts of our government are not run by idiots. These are ordinary people like us, doing a job. By and large, they're trying to do it as well as they can. Or at least as often as people in the private sector try to do as well as they can. P. J. O'Rourke dumbgovernmentidiot share on social