Top 481 Quotes by P. J. O'Rourke

About P. J. O'Rourke

These are some quotes by American author P. J. O'Rourke Comedian, who was born on November 14, 1947.

The Afghans themselves say that if you put two Afghans in a room, you get three factions.

The Afghans themselves say that if you put two Afghans in a room, you get three factions.

P. J. O'Rourke

Rahm Emanuel is, we are almost certain, a vampire.

Rahm Emanuel is, we are almost certain, a vampire.

P. J. O'Rourke

What would annoy the most people most often? That is the true left-wing test of government intervention.

What would annoy the most people most often? That is the true left-wing test of government intervention.

P. J. O'Rourke

Democrats hate success.

Democrats hate success.

P. J. O'Rourke

Watching Republicans in Washington is like watching lemmings, if lemmings jumped into cesspools instead of off cliffs.

Watching Republicans in Washington is like watching lemmings, if lemmings jumped into cesspools instead of off cliffs.

P. J. O'Rourke

After all, what is your host's purpose in having a party? Surely not for you to enjoy yourself; if that were their sole purpose, they'd have simply sent champagne and women over to your place by taxi.

After all, what is your host's purpose in having a party? Surely not for you to enjoy yourself; if that were their sole purpose, they'd have simply sent champagne and women over to your place by taxi.

P. J. O'Rourke

Our regulatory bodies strive to create honest dealings, fair trades, and a situation in which no one has an advantage over anyone else. But human beings aren't honest. And all trades are made because one person thinks he's getting the better of the other, and the other person thinks the same.

P. J. O'Rourke

Raining on parades requires no skill or effort on the part of a politician.

Raining on parades requires no skill or effort on the part of a politician.

P. J. O'Rourke

As a former writer for the 'National Lampoon,' I've probably contributed to the sea of sarcasm in which we live.

As a former writer for the 'National Lampoon,' I've probably contributed to the sea of sarcasm in which we live.

P. J. O'Rourke

The Clinton administration launched an attack on people in Texas because those people were religious nuts with guns. Hell, this country was founded by religious nuts with guns. Who does Bill Clinton think stepped ashore on Plymouth Rock?

P. J. O'Rourke

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