Jon Stewart

The Internet is just a world passing around notes in a classroom.

I don't care about wealth. What seems to be upsetting is institutionalizing the advantages that wealth gives you.

Why is it that if you take advantage of a corporate tax break you're a smart businessman, but if you take advantage of something so you don't go hungry, you're a moocher?

Do not give in too much to feelings. A overly sensitive heart is an unhappy possession on this shaky earth.

My first career ambitions involved turning into a boy; I intended to be either a railway guard or a knight errant.

I always dreamed of writing in an orchestral context. But when you finish a piece, you want to hear it. So we played everything with Phish.