Top 51 Quotes by Jimmy Kimmel

I have had a lot of experience in broadcasting.

That's my main flaw: I always think authority figures or my boss is going to think something I do is funny. And usually they don't.

I don't eat two days a week. And people are fascinated by it, but it works. If you cut two days of food out of your life you will lose weight.

I never imagined being on television.

I like a real beach. A crowded one, you know? People, towels, umbrellas. I hate those little private strips of sand you see up in Malibu.

I'm a creative consultant, whatever that means.

When you know someone you can make a little more fun of them without them getting offended.

My definition of cursing is probably different from what other people's definitions are.

No matter who it is, I hate to see people losing their jobs. I really do.

On Letterman and Leno, it always bothers me when they go outside the studio and it's daytime.