Top 451 Funny Quotes

Comedy is surprises, so if you're intending to make somebody laugh and they don't laugh, that's funny.

Comedy is surprises, so if you're intending to make somebody laugh and they don't laugh, that's funny.

Norm MacDonald

It usually takes two people a little while to learn where the funny buttons are and testy buttons are.

It usually takes two people a little while to learn where the funny buttons are and testy buttons are.

Matt Lauer

My knowledge of Vancouver and Canada was limited to what I knew about Bob and Doug McKenzie. I thought they were funny, talking out of the sides of their mouths and saying 'eh' and wearing toques.

My knowledge of Vancouver and Canada was limited to what I knew about Bob and Doug McKenzie. I thought they were funny, talking out of the sides of their mouths and saying 'eh' and wearing toques.

Peter DeLuise

I'd so much rather people think I was funny than pretty.

I'd so much rather people think I was funny than pretty.

Kristen Johnston

It's funny how you get a bit older and become more accepting of things. When you're in your twenties, you're skeptical of everything. I definitely felt like that.

It's funny how you get a bit older and become more accepting of things. When you're in your twenties, you're skeptical of everything. I definitely felt like that.

Jamie Dornan

It's funny; I'm in some ways hopelessly masculine, but I don't fish, I don't hunt, I'm not that into sports. I can't fix a car. I think it's my point of view and the way I see the world.

It's funny; I'm in some ways hopelessly masculine, but I don't fish, I don't hunt, I'm not that into sports. I can't fix a car. I think it's my point of view and the way I see the world.

Corey Stoll

I am interested in shows that are not out-and-out gag fests: you see the truth of a broken heart behind them. That is what life is like: it's really funny, you see funny things as soon as you step out of the room, but underneath that is a whole bag of broken hearts. It's that real pain and that real hilarity that makes life so intriguing.

Tamsin Greig

The way my luck is running, if I was a politician I would be honest.

The way my luck is running, if I was a politician I would be honest.

Rodney Dangerfield

Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.

Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.

Mark Twain

I don't follow anything blindly. I have to know the entire thing, if I have to get in to it. It might sound funny to you, but it's like using English language. I use an English word only when I know its meaning and understand its connotation. You won't hear me say, 'What's up, dude' or anything like that just for the heck of it.

Kailash Kher

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