Top 451 Funny Quotes

On the stage you're there, it's live. There's a beginning, a middle, an end. When something is funny you hear it right away.

On the stage you're there, it's live. There's a beginning, a middle, an end. When something is funny you hear it right away.

Theodore Bikel

Success is always less funny than failure.

Success is always less funny than failure.

Jon Ronson

Some of those more out-there jokes were written in the wee hours of the morning. Somehow, they remained funny the next day.

Some of those more out-there jokes were written in the wee hours of the morning. Somehow, they remained funny the next day.

Seth MacFarlane

Chris Elliott could read the phonebook and he's funny.

Chris Elliott could read the phonebook and he's funny.

Seth MacFarlane

There's nothing I dislike more than being in a photo shoot where they say, 'Be yourself.' That's not why I became an actress. That's what I find so funny: that you become an actor, and all of a sudden, everyone wants to know about you. But I didn't become an actor so I could show you me.

Margot Robbie

It's my mission to get the New Zealand accent into a Hollywood show. I'm proud of the way we talk, and I'm here to represent it. Kiwis are everywhere: they're in every city of the world. I've checked. We have a voice... it's a bit of a funny one at times, but it's one that I want to promote.

Rhys Darby

Every man's dream is to be able to sink into the arms of a woman without also falling into her hands.

Every man's dream is to be able to sink into the arms of a woman without also falling into her hands.

Jerry Lewis

I've always had a penchant for dialects. I remember getting detention and being told, 'Have a think about where doing these funny voices might get you someday.'

I've always had a penchant for dialects. I remember getting detention and being told, 'Have a think about where doing these funny voices might get you someday.'

Nolan North

I'm not sure when exactly I knew I was funny, but I always knew I was different. I never had an 'edit' button and would say whatever came into my head. Most of the time, what came out of my mouth was the very thing everyone else was thinking - but too polite or afraid to verbalize.

Judy Gold

I haven't been offered a lot of comedy. In theater, I've done quite a bit of comedy or dramas that included a lot of funny stuff. But in my TV work, those aren't the roles that I've been offered.

I haven't been offered a lot of comedy. In theater, I've done quite a bit of comedy or dramas that included a lot of funny stuff. But in my TV work, those aren't the roles that I've been offered.

Mireille Enos

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