Allan Sherman

Adultery - which is the only grounds for divorce in New York - is not grounds for divorce in California. As a matter of fact, adultery in Southern California is grounds for marriage.

The difference between reality and unreality is that reality has so little to recommend it.

It's a play where something went wrong, 'Cause it's five hours, twelve minutes long. If you sit there, my friend, From beginning 'til end, Then your bladder better be strong!

It's going to be a rule, I think, for wearing a crash hat, and I actually fractured my skull through not wearing a hat. I was so lucky to escape from that, and now, it's something I always do.

America is sick and tired of spending hour upon hour sitting in their automobile trying to get to work, trying to get kids to school, trying to get to a doctor's appointment.

It took me realizing that a broken heart has never actually killed anyone to find the courage to ask for what I want, in just about every situation. That was part of my own growing up.