Jimmy Fallon

My dad used to work at IBM, so we used to get discounts on computers and stuff, and I did have a ThinkPad.

Thank you, hard taco shells, for surviving the long journey from factory, to supermarket, to my plate and then breaking the moment I put something inside you. Thank you.

Anything I learned was just work hard, just keep working and don't worry about the outside stuff. Whatever happens will happen.

Barack Obama is crazy sexy.

People say if you're doing an art project, that's different from a book, but I honestly don't see it. I try and try, and I just don't.

It takes all kinds to make the world go 'round. If everyone was straight-laced and uptight, it would sure be a drag. We need a little tug of war in society.