Denis Norden

And if you can offer an explanation as to why it doesn't work then you've got to the whole root of comedy.

I defy anyone to get a decision that quickly these days.

I used to like writing for comedians - I enjoyed the challenge of making other people funny.

Where does it stop? You get offered money for your wedding, then for your kids, new houses, holidays... We earn enough from football and sponsorships, why do you need any more?

As a young child my attention span was, as I remember it, rather short.

It took me realizing that a broken heart has never actually killed anyone to find the courage to ask for what I want, in just about every situation. That was part of my own growing up.