Dan Castellaneta

Getting out of jury duty is easy. The trick is to say you're prejudiced against all races.

It's the cushiest job, but some lines are so funny that I crack up.

To many, Homer may appear lazy and a loser, but he's just much misguided. He's boorish, sure, but well meaning and, I guess, the one thing we have in common is the pursuit of lousy diets.

I broke with my religion in college.

What people don't understand about Sarah Palin is that she is a rancher's wife. From Alberta down to Texas I've known women like that: good common sense, bright and vilified by city people.

If every time you engage in a sex act, you go into a confession box, you will never accept your own sexuality.