Top 120 Quotes by Dick Cavett

If your parents never had children, chances are you won't either.

I have yet to see one of those Comedy Central shows with multiple standup comics that doesn't include someone the size of the Hindenburg.

Every comic can report a few 'gift from the gods' moments.

I know what it feels like to be a gun lover.

I find most 'sacred music' pretty dismal.

Every time someone says, 'You know, we really ought to get together,' if I were really honest, I would ask 'Why?'

When I'm doing an appearance somewhere and taking questions from the audience, I can always count on: 'Tell about the guy who died on your show!'

My IQ is somewhere between Spiro Agnew's and Albert Einstein's.

It was well after college that I learned about depression. I got my first job for Jack Paar. I realized I was sleeping 14 hours a day and just living for the Paar show.

Comedians are sometimes resentful of their writers. Probably because it's hard for giant egos to admit you need anyone but yourself to be what you are.