Lewis Black

There's no such thing as soy milk. It's soy juice.

All the candy corn that was ever made was made in 1911.

Parenting isn't just parenting your own child.

I studied international relations and economics at the University of Virginia. I paid my way by working as a bartender in the summer and at three part-time jobs during the year.

I used to have nightmares when I was a little kid that I woke up prematurely and opened all the Christmas presents. And then I would be so relieved when I woke up and I realized that I hadn't done it.

I have been given permission to announce that I and others from 'All My Children' have been approached by the company Prospect Park, who bought 'AMC,' with the intention to move it online.